The Fall

http://www.thephotographylink.com/archives/date/2008/09

So I've never written about why I moved from my hometown of Houston, Texas to Dallas... 

It's because of a guy.  

There. I said it. And looking back, it was the funniest, kookiest, quirkiest turn of events: In one weeks time (in the same month that I stated "I will never live in Dallas, Texas.") the owner of the condo that I was subletting went bankrupt, forcing me to move out, the position that I had at my law firm changed to a "firm-wide" position (meaning I could do it from any city our firm exists), and a guy from Dallas randomly (and I do mean randomly) called - determined to date (and from what he said {God love him} marry) me.

In one week - the tables began to turn. Life started moving quickly and, a few months later, I found myself in a city that I had sworn I would never live. 

The job was horrible... the boy and I were a disaster in the same city {we went from great to irrecoverable in FOUR days} and I was all alone. A native Houstonian, one who had built deep friendships and community, found herself all alone, in a place she had never planned to live.

I have learned that there is ONE, and I mean ONE explanation for Bermuda Triangle moments like that one: And that is The One... The One who had grown tired of my complacency, who was frustrated with my safe zones, and who, praise Him, loves me enough never to be satisfied with less than the best for me. That One said, "Ready or not... here I come. I am going to take you where you never dared to dream. I am going to stretch you more than you have ever been stretched. I am going to make you fully mine."

And so He has. 

Yesterday, on a run through an area of Dallas that has come to be so close to my heart, in a split second, a dog barked, the light hit, the song on my iPod changed, and I began to cry. Because, in that moment, I realized that in this place of no comfort zones, of many questions, of much confusion, I had fallen in love with our Lord all over again... and this time, the love was so much deeper.

I have been up with Him, I have been down with Him - but this time I was just with Him, and I felt Him with me... so close, so deep that it penetrated every fiber of my soul. The only response was tears. The only words that I could produce were "I love you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for loving me." Knowing fully that, in a moment where words can't even do justice, I had just tasted the tiniest piece of the love that He has for me. I humbly say that I have no idea why He loves me that much, and I know He loves me ten trillion to the infinite degree times more than that. I praise Him that I will have eternity to wonder why, while thankfully basking in the truth that He does.

There will never be a love story more precious than this one. And I can honestly, fully and completely say that, although there are stories in my past that I don't like, I wouldn't trade any silly or sad story that I have for the fact that He allowed me to be lonely enough and longing long enough to taste His love. Because no matter what man comes into my life... and, even in typing this, I grow excited about the idea of loving him with the love I've been given... but, no matter who he is or when or how he arrives, I've already tasted the caviar... I've already driven the Bentley (pardon the Dallas analogies)…  I've felt the beauty, the weight, the consistency, the glory, the indescribable love of our Maker. This man, whoever he is and wherever he may be, will always be second fiddle and praise, I mean PRAISE our God for that, because let's be honest some days he won't even deserve that title. Our God has given me my fountain of love. I have met my Prince... I know Him... I've felt Him... His love is in me and; therefore, in obedience to Him, I will love like He loves me.

So praise Him... praise Him for the tears, the loneliness, the longing, the darkness, the questions, the confusion... praise Him that He allowed me to have only Him.... praise Him.

I don't know if you've found yourself in a similar situation lately or if you've been there before. But, if you feel as though the Lord is stretching you farther than you've ever been stretched, if you feel as though you're about to break… trust me - He is and you aren't.   

Because He loves me - because He loves you, He allows for seasons in our lives where every comfort zone is removed. He, by His grace, forces us to turn fully to Him - to rely fully on Him - to lean so far into Him that we fall... fall in love with Him all over again.

-Biblically Blonde

Spring Has Sprung

Spring is in the air! 

{It must be… I couldn't breathe out of either of my nostrils this morning.}

I love that feeling - not not being able to breathe but the feeling that we're on the cusp of something "new." And everything is feeling new. The weather is changing, spring and summer plans are being made… and, to top that off, Starbucks has just released their new cups and sleeves {they're green and sleek and I love}.

There is something so freeing and refreshing and hopeful about "new." Oh, how I love that we serve a God that majors in "new."

"Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness."{Lamentations 3:23 & 24}

Don’t you love that? His compassions - most translations say "mercies" - are new every morning. No matter how much of His love you used up or rejected yesterday, no matter how much of His grace had to be exerted in your life…  you, my dear, have a fresh batch today. 

I mean somebody say "Amen" to that!

However, there is a darker side to Lamentations 3… and that is that the rest of the chapter discusses how the Lord has literally been pelting and pummeling the author.  Tough to stomach, huh? ...That the all gracious, all loving God who grants us a fresh dose of mercy daily also allows and even participates in the pruning that proceeds.

Yet all seasons are purposeful… in the climate and in our lives. There are times of winter - those times of cold, frozen tundras of the soul, but because of the Lord's love Spring always proceeds the winter.

As I walked across the courtyard of my office building this morning, I still saw empty trees, I still saw results of a long a tough winter, but I felt something new…. I felt the cusp of spring. No matter what season you see, in your life today… remember, spring is coming… new things are on their way… great is our God's faithfulness.

-Biblically Blonde

"See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:19