In March of 2008, as I was racing into a Country Club in a bridesmaids dress from one wedding, about to change into a dress for another wedding, I got asked at least 10 times... "Have you seen the movie 27 Dresses?"
The first few times I was asked, I would smile and calmly say "no." However, about five times in, as my teal taffeta dress was falling to the floor and my black dress was being slipped over my head, I began smiling and sternly saying, "no need... I read my prayer journal."
And that, ladies, was March of 2008. Need I remind you that we are now two weeks shy of March 2011 and the dresses keep piling up as the single friends keep slipping away. {I have actually, finally seen 27 Dresses... cute movie where even SHE gets married 1.5 hours later...}
I am losing another batch of friends this spring and summer. I keep making new ones, and they keep finding the right one. I have said, on multiple occasions, "become my friend and you'll be married in less than a year." {Not meet the one that you're going to marry in less than a year, but actually be married in less than a year.}
This promise has yet to fall short {sidenote: lifelong friends are excluded from this rule - but most of you are married by now anyway}.
So after several springs and summers, I have accumulated quite a collection of girlfriends, and I love each and every one of them, but I'm still all alone on weekends and holidays {those times where I feel like couples are couples and me, as a single is just in the way}.
There are days when I want to scream and shout... wait... I do scream. I do shout. ...And the cycle keeps repeating itself.
I'm frustrated. I'm lonely. I have a right to be frustrated, and I have a right to be lonely. I can take both of those to the Lord. I can take them to Him multiple times a day. He can take it. Praise Him that He can take it.
So, I question Him… I plead… I beg… I cry. I lean into and on Him. I have a right to. Trust me, if you've seen some of the dresses I've worn, you'd cry too.
I might feel like I have the right to pout, BUT I do not have the right to panic.
I have had verses pop into my mind from time to time, but I have never had one fly out of nowhere and impress itself upon my heart. That is, until now.
It happened while I was in New York three weeks ago for work. In the middle of a stimulating meeting on the cycle of a bankruptcy, I heard Joshua 3:4… "and then you will know the way to go, you have never been this way before."
Please know I have not read Joshua in years nor recently heard a sermon on this passage. That verse was not coming from the outside, it was coming from within.
I turned the verse over and over in my head, for the next few days. I read the context and reminded myself of the circumstances surrounding it. And then it started happening… that verse started appearing everywhere… as the theme verse to a Bible study that I started the following Tuesday… in e-mails from friends… in forwards that I received.
I don't know what He's up to, but God is intentional. Ladies, if you hear me say anything, hear this - our God is intentional.
I'm frustrated and tired and weary because I feel like I am living the same song, two hundredth verse… but what if I'm not… what if God is doing a new thing… what if I've never been this way before.
The context of this verse - the entrance of the Israelite nation into the Promise land - carries with it a lot of weight. This generation was able to enter because they not only believed in God, but they also believed Him fully capable of doing what He said He would do and doing it through them. However, just like any God thing… He does His thing at His own pace and in His own way. Therefore, it makes sense that the instructions, for entering the promise land, dealt with distance and with pace.
I love how Major Thomas describes this scene in, The Saving Life of Christ:
"They were to give God room to maneuver in time and pace; they were not to crowd in on the situation, but to keep well back. The Bible records for us so many tragic blunders committed by good, earnest, sincere, well-meaning men in a hurry, who acted precipitately under the pressure of circumstance. Learn to give God room to maneuver. Learn to be still and to know that He is God. You do not have the right to panic! If you are solidly convinced that God is the arbiter of your affairs, you will never be anxious. 'Commit thy way unto the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will bring it to pass…rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him. (Ps. 37:5, )'"
What I must remember is that God is in control. None of my days… not even those spent in silly side less, backless numbers or yards of teal taffeta are a surprise to Him, not one. He knows where I am and He knows where we're going, and I can't rush Him {although I can beg, plead and prod Him}.
You see, I could see spring coming and try to hurry ahead, but that would be at my own peril. Because maybe, just maybe, "I've never been this way before."
-Biblically Blonde
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